Thursday, January 24, 2013


Wow, it's been a long time since I last wrote anything on here. To think what I lier I was to say you would hear more from me if you read the last post and then to drop off blogland. Turns out my sweet little netbook broke and Shane uses his laptop much and to be honest I am just tired after work. But being sick with the flu and having to be in bed most of the day made me want to write a little (lot) bit. I feel much better today and no fever. Yay!

I have tons of pictures from this summer that I wanted to post but since I put them on FB I don't feel like I need to do it here anymore. I decided this won't be our family journal since I can't make myself print it (I assume it's not cheap so for bugetary reasons) and also I would put more personal stuff in a real journal so that wouldn't even be on here. It might then explain why I stopped writing aside from the computer breaking. But I go on weird phases so that's nothing new. Ha ha

On the other hand I am starting to create photo books and printing those as I get good deals. I just did my first photo book for my aunt whose wedding she asked me to photograph. I was terrified and told her not to expect pro results as I'm not a pro; especially with an indoor wedding event and with my not so pro equipment plus no experience with weddings but she was nice and said she was just glad to have someone there taking pictures and not to worry so that took the pressure off a bit. I gave her a photo book for a present and she seemed so excited about it.  I loved it so much too that I totally caught the bug and want to start getting each kid their baby books, summer trips, etc in that format.

On the news front, things have been good in our neck of the woods. I've achieved something this past year I never thought that I would and that is to feel like I am finally happy with myself and as a result happy in general. No more negativity, no more getting down on myself. My happiness has increased a hundred fold. I can even say I don't even compare myself to others anymore. I just don't care if I'm not the best, coolest, popular, smart, pretty, thin, talented, blah blah, all the things I always wished I had, etc. Who  knew how freeing it feels to love oneself? I am ashamed to admit how much of the opposite I have always done with myself. Those who really know me I am sure knew that about me. And why? I allowed dissatisfaction to make me unhappy and as it turned out I learned that it shouldn't. See below for book I'm recommending.

I just owe my family a happy mom, and a happy mom doesn't hate herself and feeling less all the time. A happy mom is grateful for what she has, indeed strives to be better but is kind in remembering that I'm here to try my best, fall and get up again and again.  It's not easy, I falter a lot but I just simply refuse to get mad with myself much anymore. And it all started with a wonderful book I read that surely should be a must read for everyone. It's not like the book was a self esteem book but what I got out of it helped me in more areas in my life than many other things out there. The book is: Happiness Is a Serious Problem: A Human Nature Repair Manual by Dennis Prager. 
I cannot say enough good things about this book. It's a short quick read but the author is so unbelievably wise and the way he writes is powerful and so concise and down to the point. It's not just mumbo jumbo pshycology stuff, he's obviously done a lifetime of research and on a multitude of topics. You don't even have to agree to all the point s he's making for this book to jog your brain quite a bit. He has a radio show even that he dedicates one hour on Friday to happiness that I listen to. It's all online too. Check it out. It's called the Happiness hour. What a wonderful thing God gave me in my life to wake me up a bit. I love life and all the things we learn all in their own due time.

It's kind of hard admitting jealousy, feelings of worthlessness, etc but I tend to care to be honest so I guess that's why I'm writing here.

I also want to actually mention that cutting down on blogging, fb also helped. Not so much that they are bad at all but to me they just suck precious time. So I get on the computer whenever Shane doesn't use it, to read about my friend's lives but not as often as I used it. (Sorry if I'm not the best comment maker; I do love you) It seemed quite the compulsion. Same with pinterest, etc. Now I get on that site if I have a party coming up, if I have specific needs for new recipes, new craft but not just to spend time if I'm bored.
I also have started to read a lot and I LOVE it. It's so much fun and it's a good wind down for me going to bed as opposed to any kind of screen time that makes me wired.

As far as excercising, (another thing that seemed to create unhappiness in my life for the fact that I felt guilty for not doing it) I am also kind with myself on that. I am having problems with both my feet and for a while I am just trying to get them to feel normal before I attempt running or zumba again. It's hard being patient but the stuff seems to take a loooooong time to heal. When I do get better I fully intend to go back and ease into it this time to avoid future injuries. I loved exercising when I put the time in. It gave me energy and made me sleep well at night, plus it lessened my seasonal depression in the winter.

For now I am trying to eat less carbs, more fruits and veggies and lean meats.

My family is doing well. Dacian is doing excellent in school and is a happy kid. Lavinia is really cute and fun and sweet and I want her to stay this little forever. She is loving gymnastics. Shane tore a tendon in his ankle so he's wobbling around but other than that he's happy and well. We read that book together and it opened up some great conversations.

So there you have it, finally some news.

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